Part 12 of My Purpose Story
We got approved! In September of 2009 we were officially given the green light to start looking for homes. We weren’t approved for much, but that didn’t matter to us; we were about to be homeowners. Truthfully, we didn’t have an ideal side of town, and with me being from out of state, I had no idea what the neighborhoods in Tucson were like. I could see the excitement in Doofy’s face when we would drive by his old stomping grounds, however, he made it a point to tell me that we were not going to buy a home around his old neighborhood. “It’s just not a good area” he said.
After looking at several houses, my excitement started to wear off. You see, at this time, the U.S. was in a major recession. This is when the housing bubble had popped. Many people were approved to buy large homes, at over inflated prices, and then when the market suddenly crashed; everyone and their mother was underwater on their home loan.
That is when Doofy and I started shopping. The houses we saw were beautiful on the outside but destroyed on the inside. One house had walls filled with graffiti, while another house had a secret stash room underneath the staircase where the sheet rock had been torn out. “They used this area to store drugs” the realtor said to us. The thing is, Tucson is a major drug hub with how close in proximity it was to Nogales, Mexico. I mean, we are only 45 minutes from the Mexican border. Being from Washington state, I was never really exposed to seeing anything like this. My eyes grew big. Dorothy wasn’t in Kansas anymore that’s for sure!
“Don’t give up” our realtor said to us, “we will find you something in your price range.” We looked for weeks until we found a small townhouse. It was completely remodeled, move-in ready and under our price range. “Ughh, I don’t want this house” I whined to Doofy when the realtor wasn’t looking. “We don’t have much of a choice, unless you want to stay at my dad’s house” he said. Honestly, I wanted to stay anywhere but there. Our realtor saw the look of despair on my face. “This is as good as it’s going to get in this market right now” he said. “Listen, you two are still so young (we were both 26 at the time) this is just your starter home, as you grow older and make more money together, you will eventually find your dream home” he said softly.
Starter home? I had never considered that. Everyone I ever knew bought homes and stayed in them their whole lives. I never considered the possibility of buying more than one home. Looking back, perhaps our realtor was another messenger sent to us from the universe to remind us that we really could have it all. I mean, I am typing this from the third home we just purchased last summer, and it is our dream home, in our dream neighborhood, but that’s story for another day.
We purchased our first home and closed on October 30, 2009. We were excited. “Just three years, just three years” I kept repeating to myself. We only had to live in that house for three years in order to not to be in debt to the government. If we made that home our primary residence for three years, we wouldn’t have to pay the $8,000 stimulus back. Doofy looked at me like I was crazy. He couldn’t imagine doing this again. I think he thought I was a forever dreamer, and the truth is I am. I had so much validation in my life until this point, that I knew deep down there was a higher power who was at the wheel of my life.
Life had really taken a turn for us. I continued to help as many people as I could in my work as a paralegal. The attorney’s I worked with, were selfless, and full of passion. I could see they were tired, but they were fighting the good fight. The next year in 2010, I applied to The University of Arizona, and I got in! I was officially a student while working full time. I was exhausted at the end of each night, but I felt so blessed to be able to go back to school. I only had two years to go get my Bachelor’s degree. I chose a major of Political Science because I knew I wanted to apply to law school. There really is no real undergrad requirement to get in.
I worked towards that for the next couple of years. Looking back, I have no idea how I did it. Working full time in a law office, went to school full time, raising a baby, and being a wife; but I did it. My superpower was staying in the present moment, and it still is. I didn’t look ahead or feel stressed or anxious about upcoming deadlines, I simply worked on my task’s day by day. On days I would feel anxiety creep in, I would tell myself “there has never been a day where this did not get done.”
In the fall of 2011, I changed my major to Sociology. Not because I wanted to, but because the Political Science classes I need for my major were mostly offered during the day when I was at work. I felt a little upset, but my advisor assured me I was still on the path to law school. I had straight A’s and was still very motivated. “Studying groups of people was sort of fun I guess” I said trying to convince myself. That fall, I started preparing for the LSAT. I signed up for a prep course that would take place on Saturday’s, all day on Saturday’s. I was upset. I was already stretched so thin, but I knew I was doing this for our future. “I got us” Doofy said to me. “Don’t worry about the house, or Aleena, I will take care of everything, just stay focused” he said. I still don’t know what I did to deserve that man.
Then just like that, the big day had arrived. It was time for me take the LSAT. They were so strict. I looked around the room, everyone looked nervous. I saw a bunch of white faces. I was a part of only a handful of Hispanics in the room ready to take the test that day. That fueled me. “I got this” I thought to myself. The test started and I instantly felt panic. “I don’t got this” I realized. The LSAT is filled with puzzles and riddles, with questions like “if boat A went out at sea at 10 am and boat B went out to sea at 1 pm.” FUCKKKKKK! I hated puzzles, and to be honest, I didn’t practice as much on those as I should have. “Oh well, fuck it Dora, you are already here, just have at it” I convinced myself. When the test was over, I walked outside to see Doofy’s smiling face. I wanted to cry. “How did it go?” he asked. “I need a drink” I replied. He knew I felt defeated. There weren’t many times in my life where I had given up and surrendered to defeat, but this was one of them. He let me be.
I got the score back, and it wasn’t a good enough score to get into law school. The attorneys I worked with assured me I could retake it, and that not everyone gets a good score the first time. But to be quite honest, I wasn’t sure this was my path. Not because of the test, but because my intuition was tugging at me again. I knew I had to stay “quiet.” Something big was about to happen.
“Have you ever considered counseling?” my law school friend asked me. “Counseling?” I thought to myself. “No, I haven’t” I replied. “We work with all these women and families who are victims of crime and domestic violence, and I see the way you talk to them and listen, I just thought counseling seems like a better fit for you” she said in her French accent. A light bulb went off. That is when I felt it. I felt a full blown, textbook, slap you in the face, “epiphany.” “Damn you Universe, another fucking curve ball I didn’t’ see coming!”
See you next week for Part 13 of my purpose story. I promise I will be on time. Thank you for reading this, and as always subscribe to my blog so you can get the post first. Love you guys!
